There are times when I just feel utterly worthless. Like, what am I good for? Nothing. I wonder when Im dead and gone, who will remember me, who will mourn. Im not only talking about family but to the people around me. My friends, my colleagues, those i barely talk to and those who know me. There are worse times when I felt like I was living in dystopia. Then the feeling pass. And then it all comes back again, like a cycle, a plague, an intangible insurmountable feeling of dread, despair, helplessness, despondency and everything rolled into one. Doesnt help that I like listening to sappy romantic and (usu) sad songs. Only succeed in making me more depressed. Since thinking too much doesnt ameliorate my state of mind, I shall not think then. Just let me live in vacuity, devoid of everything, just pure emptiness.

If I could turn back time, I'll do my best to make things right and not make the same mistakes again. If only...